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Catching you all up

I thought I’d go back to last week and tell you a bit about what happened when I was in London.

Tim and I had planned a lot of things to do together. We did some of them. And some others we did so much we didn’t have time for everything we’d planned. (hehe)

On Friday, Tim took me to the pub he grew up in. His parents ran a pub in Hampshire called the Hare & Hounds. We rented a car and drove out there for lunch.  It was lovely and the food was delicious.

Then he took me into the village where he went to school and to the medieval church where the school kids go (or went) to mass every day. It was lovely standing in the shadowy interior of the stone building. We kissed in th aisle and joked about getting married there.

My birthday happened while I was there and Tim took me to a restaurant called the Warrington, run by a well-known British chef. The food was yummy. It was my first day there.

I think by Tuesday, I was feeling a bit overwhelmed. There was some weird background stuff happening and I wasn’t sure how to feel. It had nothing to do with Tim, just some random stuff that had cropped up recently. And the English/American language barrier was getting me down a bit. I saw in Tim’s face that I must have seemed awfully cranky to him. I felt awful. And then he did a cool thing. He said, “I was wondering whether you’d like to have a cuddle.”

“A cuddle would be awesome,” I said. So we lay down for a cuddle. It was lovely and I felt so much better afterward. I think that was the cement. This whole thing has been so intense. So many feelings. I knew I would get a little overwhelmed at some point. So, it happened. And it was fine.

By Saturday morning, we were both trying not to think about the fact that I’d be going home in a day. Periodically I’d put my face against his chest and say, I don’t want to go. And he’d reply, I don’t want you to go.

But I had to go anyway. So I’m home now. Home. Sort of.

We spent an hour today talking about my next trip. May, if I can manage it. A month. Which we both know can seem like both an eternity and no time at all. But I’m planning for two weeks this time. Two weeks!

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Salomé has been here for a little over a day, now. I don’t think I’ve stopped grinning the entire time.

This is why I trust my intuition. She is everything I thought she would be, and nothing I thought she wouldn’t. With Salomé by my side, the time has just vanished in a hazy blur of delight. I kept expecting to get nervous, but somehow every time I gave it a shot, my intuition was there grinning at me, and it made it nearly impossible to build up any worry.

When we made it home, I then had the perfect excuse to indulge in some Veuve Cliquot, brunch care of the fantastic Plan 9 cafe round the corner, and, later, a delicious dinner courtesy of Gordon Ramsay’s minions at the Warrington, the pub that gave us the word “Randy” (in the ‘horny’ sense). Definitely one of the best days I’ve had in a long time.

And then, this morning, I woke up and Salomé was beside me. It doesn’t get much better than this.

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Stalker’s Life

London has a number of stores serving today’s busiest stalkers and spies. I found the equipment I needed easily enough and no one asked me any questions or even gave me a second look, though the sales assistant did slightly squint when I asked whether he knew a place where I could find red stilettos with steel-reinforced spike heels. In the end, I could only get black ones, which, as it turned out, was for the best anyway. I was able to wear a black lace suspender belt and seamed stockings, black bra and panties, with only the dayglo white of my skin to draw attention to me as I scaled down from the roof of the tower of the building that Tim’s flat is in.

I managed to locate his building using google earth and with the street view, I found his bedroom window which faces Sutherland Street. Luckily for me, his flat is on the fourteenth floor, so I only had to rappel down over the penthouse and the fifteenth floor to get to his window. The tricky part was going to be swinging out far enough to break through the glass plate with my heels. As it happened, he had left the window open, so I only had to get through the screen.

Still, a scantily clad woman bursting through your bedroom window on a rope has a pretty dramatic effect. Unexpectedly, Oscàr assumed a ninja warrior pose as I landed and I nearly lost my footing, but I recovered nicely and held up a book of Proust which caused Oscàr to back away just long enough for me to get inside.

Of course, Tim made me debate Oscàr extensively. Still, I think I came out ahead. I’m grateful to Tim’s friend John for nearly killing Oscàr with the heater on one of his recent visits. He was much less formidable than he might have been.

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Airport: The Movie

I arrived in London yesterday morning very early. As soon as the plane landed, I sent Tim an SMS. We texted while I waited in passport control. I could tell he was really excited I was there, about to come around the corner. It was a bit like reality TV.

When I came out through customs, I didh’t see him at first. I was with my friend Joanna and she had to point him out to me.

I went up to him. We were both grinning like idiots. He held out his arms and I got into them. Then we just stood there for several minutes until my friend rubbed my arm to let me know she had to leave. We waved good bye and then Tim and I took a cab back to his flat to drop off my bags.

I was very nervous and was having a hard time looking at him in the cab. I was hoping something would happen to make me relax. As it turned out, he had thought out how nervous I might be.  I think maybe my being nervous gave him a reason not to be, as he took it as his task to relax me.

We went out to breakfast and suitably fed and caffeinated, we came back to his flat and had champagne. It was my birthday yesterday and he brought out a little stack of wrapped gifts.

After a couple of glasses of champagne and before completing the gift unwrapping, I was pretty relaxed.

And now I’m going to write what really happened.

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Just a handful of hours.

As I write, Salomé is somewhere over the Atlantic ocean. It seems unbelievable that this is going to be our first meeting this time round. It feels like we’ve known each other for ever, and on some levels, it seems more like meeting up after a weekend away. At the same time however, it’s also somehow unbelievable, as if after such an intense long-distance connection, actually being in her presence is a pipe-dream. We’ve managed to talk, either via voice or instant messenger, every day since our first IM chat. And now I’m less than five hours from getting up to go to the airport to meet her.

I’m incredibly excited, of course. A little nervous too — the usual paranoias: what if she doesn’t like me, what if I make a complete idiot of myself, what if I can’t think of anything to say, what if roboninjas take over the airport and turn us all into flesh slaves, that sort of thing. Maybe not so much with the first one there.

I’ve spent the last week or so preparing as best I can. It’s been therapeutic 🙂  I’ve been fighting the apartment into shape, planning various fun things to do, buying various goodies, making a little birthday present, etc etc. Over all, I’m pretty happy with my preparations. I feel confident of making sure Salomé has a great trip.

More than anything, I just long to hold Salomé in my arms. It has, quite literally, been a lifetime.

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In three days time…

Tim and I are going to meet for the first time. If you’re only counting this life.

He’ll be picking me up at the airport. I’m trying not to be nervous.  I think I’m doing an okay job of it. But there are definitely moments  when I’m more nervous than others.

We’ve prepared for this by talking pretty much every day for the past three months. We’ve discussed all sorts of things. We’ve played games together online. We’ve done inkblot tests. He’s pretty interesting and has a great imagination. We both write, so we have that in common.

He’s really a very sweet man, which seems to not be the way to get women, he tells me. But I really like it. It’s very calming.

I’m having a hard time writing this without sounding all stilted.  So I’ll just blurt out how I’m feeling. I’m soooooo excited I can barely stand it. I am kind of nervous because he’s a lot taller than I am. Like 10 inches taller. But I’m trying as well as I can to prepare myself for what that’s going to be like. We’ve talked about it. I think it will be okay.

I guess one important thing to add here is that there is a very deep spiritual component to what’s been happening between us. And I don’t mean it has anything to do with religion. I mean that we immediately noticed a deep connection that I associate with being spiritual, having meaning beyond the physical world. I’ve never had that connection with anyone before. It’s very intense and I think it will be more intense when we actually  meet.

What else do I want to say? My expectations… We’re going to have a great time. There will be a lot of laughing. We’ll cook. We’ll write. We’ll see what happens.

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